Thursday, February 5, 2015

Blogville Pawlice Academy - Detective Work with Zaphod

Hi class, I am here to help you with detecting. 

First, you must always be on the look out and smell out for clues. No sight or smell is too small not to be included. While it is important to smell and look at everything, it is important not to get distracted by unnecessary smells.  Out in the field you will be bombarded with smells, it is really important to follow the path you are on. I suggest going out and practicing smells and learning to block out the unnecessary ones. Always trust your nose.

When interviewing witnesses it is important to be calm and gentle. Scaring witnesses will not help you with your case and could be thrown out of court. I suggest taking your time, getting to know them a little, and offering them fresh cookies and water. I do not suggest using cookies with fruit in them. Those won’t help get the truth, as your witness will be too distracted by the yucky taste. Rather stick to the basics that include meat. You want to use open-ended questions and be looking for the truth and not just evidence that supports your personal beliefs about a crime. We want to have a fair justice system. We want to minimize false arrests. In the cases a witness is refusing to cooperate, pressure can be placed on them. You can take their cookie away or whap them with your tail.

Once you have found clues, it is very important to secure the area. We don't want our crime scenes or evidence to be contaminated. We will secure the area, take pictures of everything and document everything carefully. This will help our evidence stand up in court. 

In the event you have to make an arrest, there are three key points to keep in mind.

1) Class, you are authorized to use force, however we do not shoot law breakers or criminals, we do not use bullets, we only stun them with poopie pellets till we can subdue them, or capture them for Frankie's Court.

2) Once the perp has been apprehended, it is essential to make sure it is the right person. A good butt sniff will help assure a positive idea.

3) You have to read them their rights. Here is the code. You have the right to remain silent, anything you say, can and will be used you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney, if you do not have one, one will be appointment to you. You have the right to a cookie, if you do not have one, one will be provided. Do you understand your rights?

Once the arrest has been made, they will be transferred to jail.

With Ranger's help, we will go out and practice our skills. I will provide some feedback.

Arty, Abbey and Mickey, that is a great example of marking evidence for pictures. Make sure no one lifts a leg on any of those markers, as it would ruin our evidence. 

Charlie, you have done a great job at securing the scene and I can see you are keeping a great eye out for evidence, witnesses and the perp. 

Freya Rose and Princess Leah, I love how you used your nose to follow this trail and mark it off. Freya Rose, I suggest you pull out the crime scene tape now, so no one interferes with our tracks! 

Riley and Dui, I am impressed how you found that evidence, marked it with a sign, and not pee and are photographing it. Great work. Class, it is important to keep your strength during detecting and have the occasional snack! 

Ruby, you have handled a difficult job well. It is always sad when a living creature, no matter how evil, dies. After securing the site, it is important to take a moment and think about the victim. 

Great work class. Any questions?


  1. Um, 'scuse me. Junior Officer Dui, here. When we're interrogating suspects, can we have some of the cookies, too?

  2. Hari OM
    Zaphod - I just knew you would have a firm but fair approach to the detection lark... eerrrrrr pawfession... This was an excellent class!!! Hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

  3. Your dedication to your training is amazing and we know you are going to make some wonderful law enforcement officers

  4. Ditto Reilly. Great job there. Have a tremendous Thursday.
    Best wishes Molly

  5. Oh I enjoyed that lesson... whap them with your tail.... wow! I love this academy...
    Easy Rider

  6. I agree with Dui, can I haf a cookie as well and of course a puppicino to wash it down?
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

  7. High Paws !!!!! Pawsome class Phod.
    Thank you for being one of our instructors.

  8. Hey Zaphod!
    Wow, you did an excellent job with our recruits today! Very thorough and easy to follow. Your cookie technique is perfect and I can tell by the pix that our trainees have taken your info to heart. Great job by you and by our recruits too. Great use of our snifflers and cookies to help our cases. Such a super job!
    Grr and Woof,
    Sarge, Police Commish

  9. Zaphod, this was a great thought out post. I learned a lot reading it, I think you really put your heart in it also. Great job buddy!
    stella rose

  10. You better not tell the public all your secrets
    Lily & Edward

  11. I just want to say that I'm SO impressed with the thorough training our officers get here in Blogville. I feel much safer wandering the streets of Blogville now.

  12. Wow! How interesting! Good job, doggies!

  13. Wow! I am so impressed with the professionalism of our Police Force. Excellent work Zaphod.


  15. Another excellent class! And Ruby showed her sensitive side!

    Your Pals,

    Murphy & Stanley

  16. Wow. I am learning alot and I am not even on the force! Interesting bit about the fruit in the cookies. Hmmmm.

  17. Hi hi hi! Ojo here! Phod, you look very handsome in your hat! I must admit that I did not hear much of what you were saying! Your hat is very handsome! But I did hear the word "cookies".

    Hang on, Cobi says to tell you that cookies with fruit in them would work for me. She says that if you give me some cookies with fruit I might confess to the crime of chewing my littlest person's lens cap.

    Wait. Hang on! I admit to nothing!



    Excuse me, is that a fruit cookie you are holding Cobi?

    Umm... No. I still admit to nothing.

    Oh no. Is that a meat cookie? And a freeze-dried sardine?

    Oh no!

    Okay! Okay okay okay! I admit it! It was me! I picked my littlest person's lens cap up off the banister by the stairs and I chewed it! It was me! I did it! I am so very sorry!

    Cookies now please!!!

    Nom nom nom nom nom...

  18. WELL done Officer Zaphod... we TRULY appreciate that you told the recruits NOT to mark thingys with PEE... the Signs are MUCH BETTER... since Ernie the Attorney and I (Judge Frankie Furter) have to Paw through all that Paperwork and Evidence and stuffs... and you know how sometimes the paws can be sorta DRY and not want to flip the pages... causing us to LICK our Paws... and... BLECH... who wants PEE PAWS... RIGHT??????
    WELL DONE LESSON... you had the recruits attention from the First to the Last... we saw LOTS of Note Taking and stuffs...

  19. Yes, so sad....poor little tree rat....RIP little buddy....I will lift my margarita glass to you my worthy adversary! What?? No margaritas on the job??? Nuts. Okays. I will lift my COFFEE mug to you!
    Okays, did someone say cookies????
    Ruby ♥

  20. What a great class Officer Zaphod! Your recruits are learning alot
    Mr Bailey, Hazel & Mabel

  21. Thanks for a great training class Officer Phod! I think I'm getting the hang of this Pawlice work! I really like using the flashy beast. Is it okay to torment our peeps with it or is it only to be used for official police business?


  22. What if we eat all da cookies when we is interrogatin suspects??

    1. Yeah, and dat tail shakin' won't werk fur us terriers and our stubby carrot tails... how about a lil of da ole shakey-shakey, at least if da perp is a skwirrel?? or a rat??

  23. Wow we can all learn a lesson or two here :)

  24. Lead Detective Zaphod, that was an awesome class...everyone followed your are a fabulous instructor.

    Top Cop Bites

  25. Kudos Officer Zaphod. Your no nonsense delivery will keep these recruits on their paws. I do have a question...where are the donuts? Haha!

  26. Detective Phod, that was a very impressive and informative class. Good job!

    Aroo to you,

  27. Crikey Officer Zaphod Sir ..... I've got a question!! My Junior Officer Dui seems to have an addiction to donuts AND cookies and he doesn't have much of a tail. So is there something else he could do to those uncooperative witnesses?? I don't want him taking their cookies and his tail is just too pathetic for a good whappin', aye??

  28. What a pawesome class Det. Zaphod sir...I learned lots!!!
    Smiley Salutes!

  29. There is so much to learn. I think these recruits are doing an amazing job. Thank you for your service to the citizens of Blogville.

    Loveys Sasha

  30. This has been very exciting Officer Zaphod,xx Speedy

  31. What a fabulous class!
    ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!

  32. We feel so safe knowing you all are getting such excellent training.


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