I am posting this a day after the 5th month anniversary of Gemi's death because I made a very conscious effort to be positive over the holidays and not to get swallowed up by my grief.
Overall, December has been a significantly better month then November. There were a few days early December that were very challenging and I felt the weight of the loss crushing on me. I think this was the residual effects of visiting the accident scene and confronting it for the first time.
I know dealing with this will be a life long process but I am finding the days when the grief and pain crash against me like huge waves on a stormy day are further apart and most days are "calm seas". I hope the worst of the storm is behind me and look forward to more heart recovery in 2012.