Friday, January 10, 2014

Feline Friday Presents The Joke Off

Ladies and Gentleman, Dogs and Cats, from all around the globe, it is time for the big event - the Joke Off!

The three top contenders from the Blogville New Year's Eve Comedy Night have submitted their best jokes to make you laugh.

Please vote for your favourite joke in the comments below. Votes will be accepted until 6 pm EST on on Sunday January 12. The winner will be announced by 9 pm EST that evening. 

Put on your depends and get ready to laugh your pants off!


An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, the eternal pessimist who refused to be impressed with anything. This, surely, would impress him. He invited him to hunt with him and his new dog. As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day long; each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the water to retrieve it. The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, “Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?” “I sure did,” responded the pessimist. “He can’t swim.”


One day, a farmer was tending to his livestock when he noticed that one of his cows was completely cross-eyed. He called up a veterinarian who told him to bring in his cow. The vet took one look at the cow, stuck a tube up the cow's butt, and blew into the tube until the cow's eyes straightened out. The vet charged the farmer a hundred bucks, and the farmer went home happy. About a week later, the cow's eyes were cross-eyed again, but this time the farmer figured he could probably take care of it himself. So he called his hired hand over, and together they put a tube up the cow's butt. The farmer put his lips to the tube and started to blow. Strangely, nothing happened, so he asked his hired hand to give it a try. The hired hand removed the tube, turned it around, put it in the cow's butt and started to blow.
"What are you doing?" asked the farmer, horrified.
"Well, I wasn't gonna use the side that YOU put your lips on."

Daisy, Bella and Roxy from

A woman took her old, very sick dog to the Vets and was told that there was nothing that could be done for the dog.....$25, please.
She said to the Vet...$25?  You haven't done anything or checked him.
The doctor disappeared for a few minutes and returned with a Labrador who sniffed the lady's dog.  The doctor returned with a cat, who stared at the dog.
Then the doctor said, "I'm sorry, but there's nothing we can do for your dog....that'll be $150."
The woman was incensed "You just told me that and said it would be only $25!  Now you say $150!

"Yes", said the doctor, "but that was before we did the Lab Report and Cat Scan!" 


Who do you think should be named funniest dog in Blogville? VOTE NOW!


  1. Oh my gosh..they were all great but seeing how we live in a red neck duck hunting area...we will go with Molly's joke.

  2. We won't vote as we are in it but Sarge and DBR made us laugh. Have a fabulous Friday.
    Best wishes Molly

  3. Hey Baggy & Nin!
    Wow, this is so much fun! Thanks for hosting the joke off and my co-jokers gave me the giggles this morning. Excellent funnies, my furiends!
    Grr and Woof,
    Sarge, Pol Comm

  4. Sarge's was my favorite, but gross, lol.

  5. OMD OMD we are on our SECOND set of Depends... These are SOOOOOOOOOO funny. We can't Chews... so we are gonna put the names in a hat and draw one... be back when we have picked one...

  6. We did NOT want to play Favorites or anythingy so we did our PICK a NUMBER from the HAT thingy... and it is.............. #2... SARGE.
    THAT was funny fur SURE... they ALL were WINNERS fur SURE!!!

  7. We vote for Sarge. The joke was disgustingly funny! (Is "disgustingly" even a word? I guess it can be a word in Blogville.) All three jokes were funny!

  8. BWaa ahhaaa ahaaaaa. All three were very funny but Sarge's made us really laugh out loud
    Mr Bailey, Hazel & Greta

  9. It's just as tough as the last one. But we're going with Sarge's!

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

  10. BOL! This are such a kick in the pants. I pick Sarge's uncles would love this one!

  11. All are good, but I have to vote for Daisy, Bella and Roxy! :-)!

  12. Oh, they are all funny....but I think the one I would vote for is the crossed eyed funny as it was gross! LOL!!!
    ((Husky hugz))
    "Love is being owned by a husky"

  13. Oh this is so tough....they are all so funny!! I am going to go with Molly's.

  14. We think Sarge's joke is gross, but we think Daisy Bella and Roxy's joke is the funniest.

  15. BOL...all so funny! I suppose Daisy Bella and Roxy

  16. I liked Molly's joke.

    Aroo to you,

  17. Mes just loves it when Mommy is surprised and laughs when she is drinking coffee!! It comes out her nose! We has to goes with the joke we has not heard before and that was Sarge's Jake about the Cross eyed cow!!!

  18. Aunt C here... All verrrrrry funny but Panda and Lupul pick Molly!


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