Don't Believe Her

Dear Blogville,

I wanted to dispel a horrible rumour I hear my Lady is spreading about me. You all know that I love my Lady very, very much. She is my very special person. I am very special boy. She says I may be her heart dog (I am not sure what that means but is sounds important). However, she is going around saying I am a huge suck-a-bear. She is telling people how extra sucky I have been since my time at camp.  Here is my side of the story.

Several nights ago, it was windy and rainy. I could tell my Lady, who loves storms, was very nervous. I came up to her around 2 am, and kissed her hand to tell her it would be ok. I only jumped up on the bed and slept glued to her for the next 4 hours because I was worried she was not feeling safe. It is my job to make her feel safe.

Then a couple nights later, when Uncle Chris and cousin Emma were visiting, I only stayed on the bed most of the night, because I wanted to make sure cousin Emma didn't get lost and end up in the wrong bed. Again I was keeping everyone safe. I see it as my duty as the guard dog to do so. It doesn't matter that for the past 6 years I have rarely spent more than an hour on the bed per night and usually only while Lady is reading before she goes to bed. Her need for guarding has changed and I therefore changed my guarding. I am not a big 80 lbs suck. I am a very fierce and big guard dog.

I just wanted to clear this rumour up.

Zaphod