You are "bleeping" kidding me

In general, Miss Hailey Bug is blocked into our room so she doesn’t make a huge mess in the night. For some reason my Prince Charming did not take this precaution. I found it very suspicious that Miss Bug was not in the room when I got up (usually she is there, in my face, carrying on while I try to go to the bathroom). I came down to this:

Not the best way to start your day!